Student art show winners announced

April 20, 2009

Reading Time: 2 minutes Over 100 art majors and non-majors at UVU submitted entries to the Woodbury Museum’s Student Art Show this March. After being judged by an external juror and the director of the museum, fourteen pieces were chosen, and twelve corresponding student artists were awarded cash prizes earlier this month.

Let the summer theater season begin

April 20, 2009

Reading Time: 3 minutes With the beginning of summer and the end of this school year’s printings of the UVU Review, come opening nights across Utah. The summer musicals that local theaters pride themselves by accompany a few eclectic locally-written and produced scripts to be performed at the smaller theaters across Utah and Salt Lake Counties.

Heavy metal cures end-of-semester stress

April 20, 2009

Reading Time: < 1 minute Stephen Fullmer, UVU professor and teacher of this semester’s Themes in Literature class, has collaborated with his students in getting bands Adjacent to Nothing and Forsaken Reminiscence to perform on campus April 27. The class, which focused this semester on the subculture and musical influence of heavy metal, has been trying all semester to get a prominent heavy metal band or musician to guest lecture in the class.

Idahoan Potatoes holds recipe contest

April 13, 2009

Reading Time: < 1 minute Idahoan Potatoes is offering $5,000 to the best dorm-room potato chef in the country. The contest, which began on March 23 and will close on May 22, will also give the grand-prize winner a year’s supply of Idahoan Potatoes. To enter, any full-time student in good academic standing must send in their original recipe idea using at least one of Idahoan’s products.

Sex-isms

April 6, 2009

Reading Time: 2 minutes Secrets are generally thought of as nefarious. However guilt and shame are not the only reasons to keep something, specifically a relationship, out of the public eye. Confidential trysts can be fun and emotionally fulfilling. The bad reputation surrounding classified connections has become a self-fulfilling prophecy, taking away the public’s chance to view an undisclosed romantic association as a privilege and a rare opportunity.

Face to face … again

April 6, 2009

Reading Time: 2 minutes This may only sound epic because the last time it happened you were about eleven years old, but Billy Joel and Elton John are coming to town. Together. The duo performed at the Delta Center in 2001, and will return to the venue (now called the EnergySolutions Arena) on Nov.

How to make summer come faster

April 6, 2009

Reading Time: 2 minutes It has been a long, hard winter. Utah County has suffered through weeks and weeks of gray skies, intermittent and unpredictable snowfall, icy roads, biting wind, and frozen appendages. Winter has forcefully taken all color and warmth from the county, holding inhabitants prisoner under skies that are the same shade as the enormous snow piles that line the road.

Official declaration of war

March 30, 2009

Reading Time: 2 minutes This Tuesday, UVU’s administration issued a shocking proclamation; UVU has officially declared war on Brigham Young University. The declaration stated that UVU was forced to take action because of BYU’s “repeated and annoying acts of douchebaggery against the faculty, staff, and students of Utah Valley University.

Seagulls finally recognized as the douchebags of the bird world

March 30, 2009

Reading Time: < 1 minute After decades of attempting to clean up the seagull’s reputation, the American Avian Society has finally decided to call a spade a spade and admit that seagulls are douchebags. The AAS released an official proclamation last week. This news has hit the citizenry of Utah especially hard, as the seagull is recognized as the certified State Bird.

Hipster briefs

March 30, 2009

Reading Time: 2 minutes A local anonymous hipster, known among students as “the one with the bright pink fixie and the beanie made of yak fur,” has been temporarily ostracized by his peers for making a quick decision about which blended coffee drink to purchase at the Starbucks at University Mall.