Lt. Shane Whitaker and The Case of The Farmington Floozy

Know what happens when you don’t read inter-office memos? First of all, you end up being the only schmuck in regular business duds on Hawaiian  Friday. But, even worse, you don’t hear about any possible sting operations that might be being set up at a seedy motel near you. Being totally ignorant of any possible decoys or set-ups, you take a half day on Friday and decide to get a jumpstart on the weekend with some good ol’ fashioned solicitation of prostitution. Little do you know that the woman you think is a hooker is actually that new lady cop you’ve seen around the station. You’ve just been busted. But, hey, to your credit, she does look a lot different in those fishnet stockings.

Early in the afternoon on July 2, Lt. Shane Whitaker of the Farmington Police Department responded to an online prostitution ad set up by police in nearby Layton. Undercover officers set up an appointment with Whitaker at a nearby hotel. When Whitaker said the magic words – “I’ll give you money in exchange for sex” – Whitaker was handcuffed in the least erotic manner possible.

Both Farmington Police Chief Wayne Hansen and officers in Layton were shocked and dismayed to discover that a fellow officer would find himself in such comprising and illegal circumstances. Whitaker was an 18-year veteran of the Farmington Police and served as the department’s media spokesman. One would think that the mouthpiece for Farmington’s Finest might consider the PR fiasco which would happen should he get caught with his pants around his ankles and a wad of sweaty cash in his fist. But obviously consideration is not Officer Whitaker’s style, which is why he is currently on paid administrative leave, awaiting further investigation by brothers in blue.

Lt. Quinn Moyes of the Layton Police Department said that this latest sting operation is one of 26 conducted by Layton officers this year. Policemen in the area should be advised, possibly do some discreet asking around, before soliciting prostitution over the Interweb. Or they should stop paying for sex.

2 thoughts on “Lt. Shane Whitaker and The Case of The Farmington Floozy

  1. This guy once arrested me for blowing up mailboxes when I was in high school, which made this story even better for me. What a bonehead.

  2. Anyone with litigation pending with him as a witness should therefore go to court and plead “not guilty”. His testimony and reports made by him will all by summarily “thrown out”.

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