“Chick flick” is Latin for unrealistic expectations

Let’s face it, any woman with an ounce of estrogen yearns for the attention and royal treatment like that of the ever-so-suave Leopold, from “Kate and Leopold,”  appropriately played by the sexiest Wolverine alive: Hugh Jackman. But how realistic is such yearning?

Frankly (and quite unfortunately), we live in a world outside of the silver screen, where a man’s perfect date would be beer, ball scratching, x-box and Monday Night Football.

In a world where many men fear the M word just as much as the bubonic plague, they would be just as content marrying the mirror and being the proud parent of 2 children: biceps and triceps.

Is the classic meathead capable of achieving such romantic refinement, or is the whole idea simply unrealistic and asinine? Has Hollywood set the bar of romance so high that not even the buffest real-life male can do a pull up over it, resulting in crushed hopes and burst bubbles for all those ladies who are suckers for such chick flicks?

Sadly, not every man will lay their jacket on the ground so your feet won’t get wet.

Not every man will step in to do the dishes and smile about it.

Not every man will hold your hand in public and introduce you to his buddies as “the most amazing girl he has ever met.”

Not every man will have roses for you “just because.”

Not every man will stay up all night making a telescope for you, his cancer-stricken girlfriend, so she can see her favorite comet. (A Walk to Remember)

Not every man will hop on a moped and chase down the taxi you are riding in just to call your bluff and tell you to stay. (How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days)

Although this may be abrupt, harsh or even offensive to an XY human being, there is not a single girl who isn’t secretly begging for this article to be proven wrong.

We don’t generally ask for much (if you’re looking for the right kinds of girls) just simply to be appreciated and sincerely told that we are loved. BUT, if you are a man seeking to further your romantic success, I suggest running to the nearest

Red Box for the chickiest chick flick you can find – therein lies the secrets of life.

Your exhausted lips, (and the girl resting on your shoulder) will thank you.