MAWLD by a cougar

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After recent events and time to mentally and physically recover from a recent attack by a mascot, I’ve decided it is my personal responsibility to warn my fellow students and fellow fans of the dangers of school mascots. Now, I believe that Willy, even though he is a wolverine, who by nature is a ferocious predator, would never blatantly attack a fan or passerby. But, not all mascots can exhibit the same level of discipline. It is dangerous to both be a mascot and be near one.

According to Merriam-Webster, a mascot is a person, animal, or object used as a symbol to represent a group (such as a sports team) and to bring good luck. These animals or objects are often found on the sidelines at a game or in the stands pumping up the crowd. However, a few weeks ago during the BYU versus UVU basketball game in the Marriott Center at BYU, Cosmo was on the attack. *

I was minding my own business waiting for the second half of the game to begin when next thing I knew, I hit the ground. Surrounded by people, I opened my eyes and was confused about nearly everything. Cosmo had ended his halftime student section cheer with what I can only imagine was an awesome flip. I am pretty sure it was symbolic of the beat down BYU did to our men’s basketball team and Cosmo just wanted a piece of the action.

So with this, I issue a warning to be careful of mascots and for mascots to be careful. Sometimes, the mascot may be angry or may be just super unaware in his giant costume, which I can only assume limits peripheral vision. But,  fans watch your back for cougars and wolverines alike.

*Okay, to be fair it was a complete accident and I am back to normal health, but what’re the odds that the opposing teams mascot happens to land a flip on the enemy’s assistant sports editor?