UVU Review’s list of things that must go

Larry the Cable Guy- A symbol of degradation in society.

Reflective Listening- It just makes people mad.

The word “Random”- As in, “did you just do a cartwheel? That’s so random!” Actually, it isn’t. I just felt like doing a cartwheel, that’s all. Get over it.

That’s So Raven- It’s a strange name for a T.V. show.

Saying “At the end of the day”- Come on, there isn’t THAT many life changing realizations at the end of each day.

Bathrooms without locks- When you’re on the john, there is enough on your plate that any sort of bathroom anxiety is simply unacceptable.

UVU Review’s list of things that must return

Crystal Pepsi- “I spilled the drink… but no stain!” Why on Earth did Pepsi get rid of this?

Pogs- Nothin’ beats destroying other people’s pogs with an oversized slammer.

Alf- A conniving alien with a trenchant wit. Who could want more.

Who’s the Boss- You are Tony Danze -yes, you are. Alyssa Milano also debuted on this show. Hot!

Unsluttly Olsen Twins- They used to be so cute. Now they are just whores.

Mullets- I can hear the Nascar runways right now…

Arrested Development- One of the best shows in our time gets cancelled after it’s third season. Good job FOX.