Parking sucks. It’s an atrocity.

The new library, grand in scale, takes up space — lots of parking space, that is. With only 8,000 parking spots to work with, and a significantly larger student body, there is a problem. True, there are spaces available out in no man’s land by the testing center with a bus en route to the school every 15 minutes. And those who have paid the absurd price for parking permits meander throughout the already packed lots, those lots that are actually within reasonable walking distance. Therefore, the only sensible thing to do is to propose a change. Why not thank those with high grades with priority parking?

Granted, the school will lose money (they’ll lose $50 a pop, for permits), but the aggressive academics will have the leisure of parking close to the school’s doors, without the stress of competing for spots on the pavement. Recipients also would have a “get out of jail free card” from the vicious campus police, who revel in their ticketing abilities.

Besides, those who want to excel academically are sure to be in class and exert themselves to get the necessary high grades, so why not aid them in the process? The school can do their part in compensating those who have a drive to succeed.
Incoming freshman would be glad to know that their 4.0 paid off not just in tuition and living expenses, but can spare them the unnecessary stresses of college parking as now present.

What about those that don’t get high enough grades? Not everyone can pull off the A grade, especially when a professor only plans to give out one or two a semester. Look, exercise has never been a negative thing. Athletes, especially, would enjoy the practice. Why not give them the farthest spots?

Though parking would remain an unpleasant experience, we can rest assured that improvements are in the works. The point still stands: We won’t be around to see it. Give priority to the intellectually inclined. Perhaps this could inspire a greater student body in future years. Then maybe they will bask in the glory of a multilevel parking complex or a cavernous underground parking network. But for now, get the A or walk.