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“Perception is our duty”
And for the record, I like going to a wacky school and I’m fairly certain I’m not the only one. Want to go to a school where people are boring? Get better grades and transfer to the zoo. Oh, and I am that student with Facebook up on his laptop and I am the back-row peanut gallery. Know what else I am? An “A” student. Life gets easier when you loosen up a little. Relax. It’s all good.

“Troubled bridge over Utah Lake”
Hey Joshua, are you retarded?

“Concealed weapons pose a threat to campus”
You say that if a concealed weapon permit holder is asked why he or she carries that they will obviously answer, “Because it’s my right”… It’s your right to shave your head and glue multi-colored playing pieces from the game “Sorry” to your skull and go around singing “tip toe through the tulips,” but people don’t do that and if they did it would not be “because it was their right.”

“Laptops: Distraction or learning aid in class”
1. The class is boring. You could pass it in your sleep.
2. You didn’t get there soon enough.
3. Did I mention that you could’ve been sleeping?

“Joe the Plumber, come to plumb”
Hey $%*&, I mean @#$%*, it’s not your school, you just pay to use it. You get what you pay for.

“Donner-Galbraith saved by concert”
punx boycott! punx boycott! get together and boycott! Punx! Punx! Punx!

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