What do you mean, Santa’s not real?

I remember it clearly.

“Mom, is Santa real?”

“Uh…Yeah, but he died a couple weeks ago.”

Oh the things parents put their poor, impressionable children through. We all had enchanting fantasies of Santa Clause when we were little, right up until they came to a screeching halt when we found out he’s not real.

Although this is a painful ordeal for our poor, five-year-old selves, it is rather entertaining to our grown-up selves. The stories of how people found out the truth about fictitious good old Saint Nick might just  inspire a ho-ho-ho on your part.

“At the first sign of speculation that Santa might be a sham, my siblings and I set up a spying system on Christmas. We all hid in different spots around the family room, and saw my mom and dad setting up presents and eating the milk and cookies.”
-Braiden Rindlisbacher

“I knew Santa wasn’t real when one year I got an I.O.U. from Santa with a picture of the bike I wanted on it. I never did get the bike.”
-James Delli Gatti

“My mom was in a hurry one year and took us Christmas shopping with her. We asked her why she was buying so many presents since that was Santa’s job. She was flustered and mad, so she just said the first thing that popped into her head: ‘Because Santa fell off our roof last year and died, so now I have to do it all!’ My siblings and I were heartbroken and did a small funeral service for Santa in the back yard.”
-Brandt Whiting

“While riding in my grandpa’s truck, he forbade me from looking in the back of the truck. Someone honked behind us and I looked back there to see all my presents, including the doll house I’d asked Santa for.”
-Ashley Young

“On Christmas Eve, my dad fell down the stairs while carrying all the presents down. It woke me up, and finding my dad on the floor surrounded by presents marked, ‘from Santa’ pretty much let me know he wasn’t real.”
-Cody Willes

“I saw my mom wrapping presents and she wrote on the card, ‘To Jordan (my brother), From Santa.’ I called her on it and she tried to tell me she was one of Santa’s elves but I knew she was lying.”
-Kristen Erickson

“I found out he wasn’t real when I had to write a paper on the life of Santa.”
-Kenzie Frei

“On Christmas we were all opening our stockings, and everyone else got something that I didn’t get. And I asked my mom why Santa forgot about me and she said, ‘Ah, Crap I forgot to put that in there! Hold on!’. She ran to the closet, came back with it, and put it in my stocking. I was horrified!”
-Sarah Hansen

“Wait…Santa’s not real?!”
-Seth Davis

“One year we got a treadmill and they took it downstairs to wrap it but they put a hole in the wall while they were trying to take it downstairs. We all wondered where the huge hole in the wall came from. Then we figured out that they were just bad liars.”
-Kaylee Fuller

“My sister found out while watching a game of ‘Family Feud’…it was really funny.”
-Riley Nielson

“I refused to believe that Santa wasn’t real until ninth grade when my sister finally broke it to me. I have been crushed ever since then. Wouldn’t it be awesome if he really was real though?!”
-Jentry Frandsen

“My little sister had a nightmare on Christmas Eve. She was screaming that Santa was going to come in and kill us all, and no consolation from our parents could make her stop crying. Finally my dad just yelled, ‘Santa isn’t real alright? You’re gonna be fine!’ And then we both started crying even harder!”
-Skyler Davis

3 Responses to "What do you mean, Santa’s not real?"

  1. james   December 23, 2009 at 2:30 am

    I came to old, It just didn’t make sense. Plus I asked my mom, and she told me.

    Reply
  2. Dennis Delli Gatti   December 28, 2009 at 5:15 am

    The reason James Delli Gatti didn’t get the bike was because he had 3 sisters and 3 brothers, and he was in jail.

    Reply
  3. Joseph Delli Gatti   April 25, 2010 at 4:55 am

    “I was 8-no, 10 and all I wanted for Christmas was this shiny,red bike. My Uncle Alfonso promised to get it for me so I began countin the days until Christmas. Christmas morning I run downstairs and what do I find under the tree? Uncle Alfonso-dead-shot in the back of the head. Plus, NO BIKE!”

    James’ life was so traumatic. I know because I am his dear brother… who laughed at him when he cried that he didn’t get the bike. I still send him Christmas cards every year with a picture of a bike wrapped in a bow with a message that says “LOL!” JK

    Reply

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