What should be a modern replacement for coal in a person’s stocking?
A flash drive with a computer virus.
Scorpions. Wait, that’s probably more primitive, not modern. But that’d teach those naughty kids!
Twilight, book or DVD.
A membership to Gold’s Gym.
For Republicans President Obama and for Democrats Rush Limbaugh.
Sarah Palin’s new book Going Rogue.
A rolled up cat poo that no one noticed under the sofa, or a six-month-old dreadlock.
Miley Cyrus CDs.
Crippling depression and an overwhelming sense of doom.
A gift baggie filled with broken glass and spiders.