My toys are cooler than your toys

It’s that time of year again, with children snuggly asleep in their beds, while sugar plums do the Macarena inside their sweet heads. With Christmas comes the inevitable commercial rush.

Since we are college students coming from a variety of backgrounds with a lot of people to buy for, here is a gift guide to some fun, and sort of wacky, Christmas presents – especially for the person who says, “You don’t have to get me anything.”

There’s still plenty of shopping and shipping time left and these are just a few of the fun things out there, so get going and happy holidays!

THE DAD
On UncommonGoods.com you can find one set of 8 cast iron twig skewers ($30.00). These skewers are shaped like twigs and would make a hilarious addition to any dad’s BBQ set, and they’re all ready for shish kebab-ing. Another recommendation is the golfer’s BBQ set ($25.00): spatula, tongs and prongs, all with insulated grips, made to look like golf clubs. Or there’s always the yellow submarine bath radio ($30.00). Any of these fancy, fun gifts will make dad happy.


THE ODDBALL
As soon as I saw it, I knew it had to be included. Again at UncommonGoods.com, get ready for this: the shower squid ($35.00)! YEAH! Right? I know. Totally cool. Made of red latex, this thing has tentacles extending from a squid head, with adjustable loops for all your shower paraphernalia. It’s just hilarious. I think I’m going to get myself one.


THE MOM-TYPES
Let me just say it: Pampered Chef. I know this stuff can be a bit pricey, but there are some things that are just worth it; for example, the stoneware fluted pan ($33.00).  I love all their stoneware stuff, but this is my favorite. Normally you buy those cake mixes and it takes 30-something minutes to make a cake, right? Then you have to let it cool, etc. With this fluted pan, you mix the cake mix like normal, then spread the frosting on the rounded bottom, pour the cake mix on top, throw it in the microwave and in 12 minutes – not joking: 12 – you take it out, flip it over, and BAM! You have a Bundt cake all ready to go. This thing was designed for busy moms.


THE GEEK
My brother is a semi-professional Trekkie. He’s also an artist and a hairstylist, and a hundred other things I could have turned into a gift he needed. But as soon as I saw a stainless steel pizza cutter shaped like the original USS Enterprise, I knew I had to get it for him. The one and only place to get it is on ThinkGeek.com – a place has it all: Star Trek, Star Wars, toys, t-shirts that you can play, brain teasers, books, electronics, spy cams, the whole shebang. The pizza cutter goes for $24.99 and is officially licensed and pretty heavy, which explains the high price. There is also a Klingon corkscrew if you’re looking to make a set.


THE STUDENT
Now I’m going to show you why ThinkGeek.com is my favorite site. Are you ready? All right. Stay Puft caffeinated gourmet marshmallows ($19.00). Yeah. They’re not just full of sugar anymore; they’re also full of caffeine! This is a Ghostbusters collectible, but the box is reusable and comes with giant square marshmallows to eat in class. There’s so much caffeine in them, they can’t even ship outside the U.S. and Canada.


THE KIDS
Dum dum dum! Kids can be the hardest people to shop for, because they will let you know right away if you screwed up. Now, me, I’m of the school of “give the kid a puppy” because I think everyone deserves a pet, and there are plenty of animals out there who need homes. But if you aren’t into that, and don’t want to acquire even more useless junk, try adopting an animal at Hogle Zoo, Living Planet Aquarium or Tracy Aviary. You get passes to visit your animal, pictures, updates and all kinds of cool stuff to teach your kid fun things whether they want to learn or not.


Visit HogleZoo.org, TheLivingPlanet.com, TracyAviary.org and UtahHumane.org for more information.

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