How to …

The College Times is running a new series of articles this semester with the purpose of teaching UVSC students about "how to" do things they most likely wouldn’t learn otherwise. The first in our series is meant to educate readers on how to enjoy a sporting event.
1. Prepare yourself. If you are totally clueless about the rules of the game, do a bit of research. For example, you should at least know that most basketball games are held indoors, or else you might arrive improperly dressed. It would also be useful to know how long a typical sporting event lasts, and if it is broken up into quarters.

2. Find a pleasant seat. If necessary, bring a pillow to sit on. Because if all else fails and you become completely lost and uninterested, you might as well be comfortable.

3. Think of the game as a rhetorical contribution to a larger conversation. The aggression behind a soccer player’s kick is no less potent or interesting than the masculine aggressive tones in Shakespeare’s MacBeth. A volleyball team’s unity is as good an example of teamwork and an all for one, one for all philosophy as Dumas’ The Three Musketeers.

4. Find the parallels between the game and your life. If, for example, you are interested in filmmaking, notice the plot structure of the game … or lack thereof. The excitement escalates with the points on the scoreboard, until at the climax the audience is sure of which team will win. Throw in a couple unexpected plot twists in the form of interceptions or fouls, and finally come to a resolution at the sound of the buzzer.

5. Bring a book or some knitting, just in case.

6. Remember that you can also watch the crowd, not just the players. Sports fans really are an interesting breed. Notice how invested they can become in the game, and how infectious their excitement is. Notice the spectators that use the event as an excuse to be around other people. Guess how much of the energy in the room is focused on the actual sport, and find out what else has drawn people to the arena or court.

If you would like to know "how to" do anything in particular, drop Mel a line at

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