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Time to press the panic button?

For Utah Jazz fans there are two ways of looking at the rocky start into which the team has stumbled early this season. After a discouraging loss to the Boston…

D&C 89 taking it to the streets

Highway 89, commonly known in the area as State Street, has now changed its name to D&C 89. State legislators made quick work towards the unanimous decision, even amid protests…

UVU announces football team, snags legend

In a press conference last week, UVU Director of Athletics Mike Jacobsen announced that the Wolverines will begin playing football in 2011. After being in the shadows of the major…

Seagulls finally recognized as the douchebags of the bird world

After decades of attempting to clean up the seagull's reputation, the American Avian Society has finally decided to call a spade a spade and admit that seagulls are douchebags. The…

Park service extends elk hunting boundaries to include UVU campus

In a 7 vs. 2 vote last Friday, Utah Park Service officials announced that they have extended the boundaries of this year's elk hunt to include parts of southwestern Orem…

So you think you can dance?

Dance majors will now have more to do than sit in the hallway of the LA building stretching while wearing arbitrary and weird sweat pant combinations with equally depressing leotards.…

Laughter, tears, and attempted assassination: A review of my drunk friends’ late night antics

The number one show to see in the valley this spring won't be found at a typical reserved-seat theater that will forever smell like the octogenarians who frequently attend performances.…

Infant Genius Refuses to Change Own Diaper

Mr. and Mrs. Locke sat petrified on their sofa and watched their daughter Genny with frozen stares. The toddler is not yet two years old, but she is swearing at…

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