Dating Column: The Fall
Falling is submitting to gravity. Falling in love is submitting to that other pulling force. With gravity, it is easy to know what you are falling to, because you just look down, but in the case of love, you can’t see the future. Yet, people fall in love and get married every day.
For my first three years of college I had a strange fear. I was afraid of married people. They didn’t make sense to me and I just didn’t like them. I didn’t want to see them or talk to them. I remember being secretly upset many times when I would walk by some good looking, young, married guy. I felt like everyone and their dog was married.
Fortunately in the past year, I have gotten over my fear, and this may be because I am less afraid of marriage. I have decided that although marriage doesn’t make sense, it probably makes life more rewarding.
You can be comfortable as a single person and function well as an adult in society, or you can get married. Marriage is probably not the most comfortable option, but I decided that comfort is not the most important thing. The question is: How do you make such a choice?
Marriage doesn’t make sense. Anyone can admit that to gamble one’s happiness on one single person is not foolproof. Last week I mentioned that the heart is necessary in serious relationships because the heart makes you just a little dumb. Well, it is true.
You have to be a little bit dumb to commit and invest, to take that leap without knowing what you are falling to. But why is falling necessary? May I suggest the alternative of rappelling? The kind with a harness and ropes seems a lot safer. It may not be quite as thrilling, and could take some patience, but this method should probably be considered. I think it would also give you more time and level-headedness when looking into that tunnel of love, that I believe is a lateral tunnel.